Blur vision

In 2017, God allowed another suffering to attacked me.

That was in middle of March, around 12pm my vision became blur and shakey. I couldn't see anything for few hours until after my rest my vision came back again.

I thought it lasted only a day. Yet the next day was the same around same time 12pm. my vision became blur and couldn't see anything again. It went on and on for weeks and months. Not only my vision disturbed me, my head spin too and vomited too. I was really scared what was wrong with me 

At the same time, Julie also have the same vision problem as well. My family asked our neurologies whether it was due to out medication. But they said it was nothing concern with it. 

During that few months, my cousins and families from Australia came out to Penang for holidays. They spent time with us. I couldn't have a good time with them. My cousins organised a potluck lunch gathering. What happen was, when I see a lot of people, not only my vision was blur, shakey and the most terrible thing was my head was spinning terribly.

Luckily, our lunch gathering was at my apartment lobby hall, I could easily leave the gathering and go back to rest. My head was so spinning and dizzy. It happened also when my family went shopping few times. I couldn't enjoyed at all as I couldn't see and my head was spinning. I had to close my eyes

Me and Julie had the same vision problem the same time. She was more serious, not only vision blur, but in that few months she couldn't see at all.  She went into emergency few times, but the doctors couldn't find out what wrong. The last solution Julie and myself was admitted in neuro ward Penang GH for a week for some tests. 

This government hospital give disabled with welfare card.free treatment and admission in the ward. 

Julie and I spent an week of agony there with so many tests done on us. 

I find it very hard to share about that week in the ward. It's a "nightmare". They checked our brain (ct scan, eye tests and many more). What I could say we had an agony of the time there . In the end, all the tests came out positive, but they couldn't find out what was wrong with us. So we were discharged.

What a happy feeling to come home!!! Our vision slowly got better in time to come. I suffered vision problem around 6 months. It was really a terrible time for me

Thank God for helping us through this difficult time..

Three days of Agony

In 2016, I seek my neurologies in General Hospital Penang for help, if they could increase my medication. Even though they increased the dosage my medicine, yet my spasm was still so severe.

I  adjourned to the emergency few times in GH to check what was wrong with me. What I suffered was, every time I went, I  had blood test and it was very painful. The doctors' checked my blood and it came out good. So they sent me home.

Yet my spasm was still very severe, so the head of neurology knows my case very well. She admitted me to the ward immediately . I stayed there 3 days. It was an hell of the time I spent my days there as no one was there to helped me. My mum and sister came in the morning, lunch and dinner time to help.

In the morning, when the nurses cleaned all the patients, they bath them on the bed. As there were many patients' to bath for. As I was the last patient they bath for. Do you know how they bath me?

They threw the backet of water on me and changed my pampers. That was it!!! Wow!!! I felt like an animal, no human being.

The worst thing was, no one helped to urinate. I had to be on the pampers from evening until the next morning. I wet on the pampers many times and I asked the nurses to helped changed, but they didn't bother about me. The bed was all wet. I had to sleep the whole two nights on the wet and smelly bed. 

It wasn't me alone like that, other patients' also told me that they were all wet. But none of the nurses changed for them too. We had to wait till next morning for other nurses to "bath" us.

The doctors' gave me new medication and on the third day, they said I could be discharged. Praise and thank God I could go home!!! My agony was OVER!!!!

The doctors' didn't know that when I lied down, I had less spasm, but only when I sit up my severe spasm attacked me a lot. They increased my medication and gave me other new medication too. The new medication didn't suit me and I didn't take the new medicine after all I came home.

Anyhow, I was so happy to come home from the so called "prison" I will always remember this "agony" I had gone through

My computer - my best friend

I thank GOD for giving me the knowledge to learn computer and to access to internet. Though the years, I have learnt a lot of things online. Many times when I was stuck not knowing how to go on, I asked my good friend (disabled too) on how to managed. He taught me a lot "new things. Thank God for this friend of mine who is every willing to help me.

From then on, I kept learning and searching new things online. I didn't give up on learning by myself

Many times, when my computer was spoiled or the internet line, couldn't get through. I got very frustrated as I didn't know to do.

My computer is my "best friend". I can say that for sure.

2016 - A very tough year - Part 2

Hi I'm back!!! Welcome a new year 2018.... God give me another year of life !!!!

I wanted to continue from previous my story about my severe spasm, but I completely don't have mood to write. Thinking back of my suffering of my severe spasm, I really feel scare. That anytime it can come back and attack me again.

I truly suffered a lot from my severe spasm in 2016.  My spasm became more and more severe as months pass, until my whole body, limbs, face were so stiffed from morning till night. It started with my left face keep pulling, my head keep falling down (became weak) and my arms and legs keep pulling me and became very, very stiffed.

No one can understand how I felt during that time. I felt very angry, frustrated, sad and etc..etc... I was very miserable because I was always very active person, but I became a person who couldn't do anything at all. I couldn't even use my computer to work as couldn't type on the keyboard. My hand/fingers couldn't control the keys and my head kept falling down.

What I could do was lie down on my bed (almost the whole day) What I could described was I HAD A VERY TERRIBLE TIME. I had difficulty in breathing as there are no air going through the brain. Also very difficult in moving my limbs.

My family members who handle me had a though time too. When my body/limbs were stiffed, it was very heavy to lift/carry me. I thank GOD for my family were patient, understanding and caring for me during my difficult time.

As I lied in bed, couldn't do anything, what I did was kept praying and calling GOD for help and heal me again...