Sunday, January 19, 2020

Family photos in the year 2019


I had not been writing much towards end of 2019 as I was occupied with things and also had no mood write. But I never forget my "baby"

Here are my family photos of year 2019...

                                 
                                 Chinese New Year Eve Dinner -Feb 2019



                                              During Chinese Year New -
                                              In Gurney Plaza - Feb 2019



                                        1st time family trip to Genting Highlands
                                                              12 July 2019   
                               
 
                                                       

                                       Me and Julie happy and excited                                                                           when reached Genting Highlands
                                                     12 July 2019


                                       Julie birthday lunch in Taxes Chicken                                                                           in 1st Avenue - July 2019




Mum birthday lunch in Food Avenue  
in 1st Avenue
Sept 2019



Christmas caroling BEC Group 11 - 14 Dec 2019



                                     Christmas Eve dinner at The Barn Rest.
                                             Gurney Plaza - Dec 2019





All look here!! Beautiful smile


                                     
                                                 Christmas carolling BEC 11
                                                           29 Dec 2019

Friday, January 17, 2020

12 Hours Adventure in Kuala Lumpur Airport

I wrote this story last year. It was what I've experienced personally. I didn't know whether to put here in my blog. But now I'm publishing it.

                             
It was the last day of our Kejohanan Sirkit  2 Boccia , from 5-9 August 2019 held in Pusat Kecemerlangan Sukan Paralimpik, Kampung Pandan. KL

After my last BC4 game finished in which I lost 2-4 to my opponent, it was around 11.30 am. My assistant, my family and I had lunch in the cafeteria in Pusat Kecemerlangan Sukan Paralimpik. After lunch, we met a few friends to discuss our Boccia balls. It was interesting hearing their discussion.

My assistant, family and I went back to our Vortex KLCC Apartment to relax I was in my room clearing my stuff, when suddenly my assistant came into my room. She told me, that they would be going back to Penang for an urgent matter. They wanted to send me back to the dorm together with my other teammates and their assistants, who would care for me.

I quickly thought of what to do. I didn’t want to go back to the dorm because I didn’t want to stay another day. As the next morning, we had to go to Dewan Boccia again for the final game and medal presentation ceremony (which I dread to go) because the Boccia court was super/terribly hot and humid.

What came to my mind was taking a flight back to Penang. I called and told 
Janice that 

I wanted to go back by plane. She agreed to find the earliest flight back.  At the same time, our coach also allowed us to go back.

What I thought looked very easy and simple, turned out that God had another plan for me.  He wanted me to experience a longer journey.

Janice called me back and told me that there were a few Malaysian Airlines flights in Subang Airport. I told my assistant and her family I wanted to take a plane. I told my assistant maybe my niece could help me, but Janice told me she was busy.  My assistant helped me pack my bags and called a Grab car They were unable to drop me at the airport as he was taking another route back.

The Grab driver was a Malay driver. We told him to help me to Subang Airport. The driver took around one hour as there was a traffic jam in certain parts of the city as it was after working hours

When I reached the airport, the driver was kind enough to park his car at the parking lot and helped me with my 2 bags.

He wheeled me near to the Information Counter and asked someone to help me.

I told an Indian female staff member near the Information Counter that I wanted to buy a plane ticket to Penang. She wheeled me and my 2 bags on the trolley to another side which was Malindo Air counter.

The female staff left me with the Malindo Air staff. The baggage was left outside the counter. I approached and inform the staff that I wanted to buy a ticket to Penang. Seeing my condition, in a wheelchair, they refused to help me.

In Subang Airport, Malindo Air and Firefly cater only for able-bodied passengers, there was no accessibility for wheelchair users to go up the airport.Passengers have to walk up a flight of stairs to go into the plane.

I continued to ask the staff there to help me walk up the plane. Their answer was still and that is very risky.

One of the staff told me to go to KLIA Airport as there was a flight at 11.45 pm.

There I was, alone in Subang airport. I tried to think of what to do. I called Janice for help. She asked me to take a Grab and go back to and join my team. In my heart, I didn’t want to stay another day. So I took action and I did it my way.

While I was alone in the airport, I wasn’t afraid or panicked. I stayed very calm. At that moment was 5 something. I had to act fast. I went to the OKU restroom which was quite a distance away. I left my luggage at the Malindo Air counter.

I wheeled myself there and I asked God to help with my toileting, protect me from any danger or any falls. I did it with God’s help!!  I wheeled back to the counter and stayed near my bags.

I saw an Indian lady. She was wearing her name tag. I quickly approached her and asked her to help me push my trolley bag outside the arrival hall. 
I wheeled beside her. She helped me outside the arrival hall. I thanked her for helping me. God really send an angel to help me.

I took a Grab car again and headed to KLIA Airport which was one hour’s journey. I asked the Grab driver to help me to get into the car.  When I was in the car, I prayed that God would send someone to help me when I reached KLIA.

At that very moment, Janice called me and asked about my situation. I told her that I was in Grab car and heading towards KLIA. She scolded me for not going back to join my team.

While in the car, I was thinking instead of making two trips to the airport, I could have done only one trip to the KLIA and take an earlier flight too.

At last, I reached KLIA and it was 8.15 pm. I saw 2 ladies standing and holding plaques in front of the arrival hall. I didn’t bother about them but I instead concentrated in getting out of the car.

After I got out of the car, the driver put my baggage on a trolley, he went off. The two ladies holding plaques approached me and asked if they could help me. I saw their name tags and I knew they were working there. They offered to wheel me, together with my bags.

When I asked them where were they from one of them told me they were Malaysian Airline (MAS) staff. I felt very relieved and pleased that I was with the right people. God really sent angels to help me!

I told them I wanted to book a flight ticket back to Penang. They were pleased to help me. The two staff wheeled and pushed my trolley of bags for quite a distance before we reached the ticket counter.

At the Malindo Air Counter, I asked them to help me find the earliest flight to Penang.  

They said there was only one flight at 11.45 pm. There were no other flights for that night. There was a Malaysian Airline Counter by the side, but the fare was very expensive. They said if I wanted an Air Asia flight, I would have to go to terminal 2 (I had to take a Grab car there.)

There was an earlier flight if I wanted, but at Air Asia, there was no one to help if I went there. So I bought a flight ticket for 11.45 pm with Malindo Air. When I was at the counter, a male staff checked-in my 2 bags.

After checking-in my bags, the male staff asked me to have my dinner while waiting. I asked him, how to contact him if I needed help. He gave me his contact no. and asked to message him, when I needed his help. Thank God for sending another angel to help me.

KLIA was big and spacious. I slowly wheeled myself to a spot where I could rest and have dinner. Some shops were still open. Fast food restaurants were open, with people queuing to eat/buy dinner.

From far, I saw the KFC outlet. There was an OKU restroom when I passed by. I decided to go to the restroom first before heading to KFC.

I asked the Lord to help and protect me as I was alone in the toilet. I asked HIM to keep me safe from danger or a fall. I could feel HIS presence there with me. I felt relief after coming out of the toilet.

I wheeled myself towards KFC which was quite a distance away. I was quite tired when arrived there. It was after 9 pm but there were still a lot of people of all races lining up to order their food.

I queued up to order my food too. As I’m a small eater, I only ordered mashed potato, salad, and ice-cream. The KFC staff was kind enough to bring my food to my table.

I ate as well as observed the people who came in and out. Many people were having their dinner/supper too.

There were many locals and foreigners lining up to order their food and also eat there. It was very interesting to see people coming in and going out.

Around 10 pm I messaged the staff to come and push me as I was too tired to wheel myself back there. He messaged that he would come for me at 11 pm. I didn’t know 

Janice had messaged me until she called me saying that my flight was delayed for 1 hour.

My goodness, that would be another one long hour waiting! Around 11 pm, the staff came to me together with another young staff. They wheeled a small wheelchair with them.

They wheeled me near the check-in place and transferred me over to the small wheelchair. This wheelchair is for disabled/elderly passengers when boarding the plane.

They helped me until the departure hall than they left.  I was really thankful to God for sending these angels to help me in my hour of needs.

Many people were waiting in the Departure Hall. It was nearly midnight and some people were half asleep. I was also very tired sitting in the small airplane wheelchair. 

We had to wait another hour for our plane. Some passengers went to the front counter to enquire what had happened. They were told that the flight was delayed.

Nearing the time, air stewards and plane crew came in. Slowly the door opens, and I was the first to be wheeled into the plane. I sat in the front row. Other
passengers slowly came in. There were many passengers on that flight as in the next few days, there was a Public Holiday.

When the plane started moving, I thought to myself, “This was the first time, after nearly a decade, that I entered into an airplane.” I was happy that I was able to fly by myself.

We were each given a cup of plain water. When we were in mid-air, the pilot made an announcement. He told us some bad news. Penang airport was closed and our plane had to turn back to KL. It was already after one am. I heard them saying the Penang line way closed at 2 am

Everyone jumped up with questions but there were no answers. I panicked too as it was very late and I was very tired. I wanted to reach home as soon as possible.

At that time, I closed my eyes and said a short prayer “Lord please let the plane reach Penang as everyone is very tired.”  Within minutes, the pilot announced “Good news.  Penang railway will be opening for our plane to land”

Wow! My heartfelt so relieved and I thanked God for answering my prayers. God was good at answering prayers. It was a miracle!!!!! There were smiles on everyone’s faces.

When we reached Penang runway track and the stop, I felt happy and relieved that I was in Penang Airport at last! 

Passengers slowly walked down the passager way. I was the last person to leave the plane. When I got down, the plane’s assistant wheeled me to collect my bags. The whole airport was so quiet and empty.

Janice was alone waiting for me at the Waiting Hall. When I saw her, I was really happy. She took me to the restroom, before going to the car.
It was around 3 am, when I got into my brother in-law’s car. They took me home.

I reached home at 3.30 am. I felt so relieved, happy and proud of myself that I could back from KL by myself with God’s help.

Thank you, Lord, for helping and guiding me back home safely.

Friday, September 27, 2019

Trigger Finger


Dear God!!

Thank you after the injection, my finger are able to close again. There is no more pain. I can move my fingers naturally again...



Amen!!!

Thursday, September 26, 2019

Be Grateful For Small Things - Trigger finger -PT.1


26 Sept 19'

Dear God!!

Thank you for this day...
Thank you for mum who assisted me from 9am-1pm in G.Hospital this morning
Thank you for giving me and mum the patience to wait in Orthopedic Dept. as there were so many other people there too.
Thank you for calming my nerve when the doctor injected my palm as I have trigger finger for the past few months.
Thank you that the odeal is over.
Thank you for the food I ate...
Thank you for everything happens today


Amen!!!


                                         

                                                 My 4th finger cannot bend


                                                      Injection mark

Tuesday, September 24, 2019

Be Grateful For Small Things


Tuesday 23 Sept 19'

Dear God!!

Thank you for all the things that you have given me. Help me to appreciate/ be grateful for them.

1.  Thank you for today
2.  Thank you for Janice who bring me to GHospital for my check-up this        morning
3. Thank you for mum who assisted me Psychiatrist dept. and wheeled me to take my medicine
4.  Thank you for the food I ate..
5.  Thank you for the rain this afternoon
6.  Thank you that I get to talked to Fr Mashall on the phone for 5 mins. He encourage me to think positive.. Was happy talking to him.
7.  Thank you that I'm able write in this blog.


Amen!!!

Wednesday, August 21, 2019

Beautiful Person


The sign of a Beautiful Person - They ALWAYS see Beauty in Others!!!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Positive Thinking is NOT only about Expecting the Best to Happen,
But is also about Accepting whatever happens IS for the Best!!!


I'm writing this to encourage myself. When I fall, I have to get up again..
Everything is God's help... I can do it.......

Friday, June 21, 2019

Forget, Appreciate and Look Forward



Starting Today - I need to forget What's Gone
                          Appreciate What still remains
                          Look Forward to What's Coming next!!!

Sunday, June 09, 2019

Learn to let go



U don't always need a plan
Sometimes U just nee to breathe, trust, let go
and see what happens

Dear God, please help me

Down Memory Lane


Sometimes a short walk
down memory lane
Is all it take to appreciate
Where U are today

Saturday, June 08, 2019

Heart is drowning


Dear Baby!!!

I have a lot of things kept in my heart, but I don't know to put into words...
I want to see the bright side of the days, but it's so hard...
I try to think positive ,but it turned out to be negetive...
My heart try to be happy, but I'm unable to smile..

I don't know weather I'm happy or sad.....

It's very difficult form me....

Dear God.... Save me from drowning!!!!

Wednesday, January 02, 2019

Happy 2019


Hi baby, sorry I didn't update until today the last day of 2018...

I have gone thru all the good and bad times this year... I know I had done my best. Thank you dear God for the great help to me and my family throughout this year. I will not write long for this time..

Below are all my pics taken in December 2018



                            8 Dec 18'

Attended Janice's good friend daughter's wedding.

                 
                                                                                     9 Dec 18'

                                                                Went to Botanical Garden. It was a                                                                          sunny morning.


10 Dec 18'

My birthday lunch at KFC Komtar.. Yummy!! Yummy!!
We went shopping too Pringin Mall and 1st Avenue


      

                20 Dec 18'

Santa Clause came to town!!! Had Christmas caroling from BEC 11 group together with our neighbours



23 Dec 18'

Me and my good friend Annah at Gurney Plaza



                                                                               24 Dec 18'

                                              Christmas time is here...And with our many gifts

Thank God for 2018 for my family and with our struggles, God still keep us together -strong and healthy...

Goodbye 2018.............

Tuesday, November 13, 2018

Daily Chores


Now is 9.15pm

Today, the whole was a busy day for my family. It was tough, difficult for us specially in the morning.
because Julie and myself wake up almost the same time. We need to do our daily toileting/bathing chorus.

I'm able to do half the daily toileting chorus and our maid will help me with bathing. Julie is completely relying on mum and our maid for eating, toileting, batheing etc.. The difficulty part is bathing for her and sitting her up onto the buggy chair.. And other chores too.

And prepare cooking for lunch. Julie comes to my room and listen  to music and chit chat with me, while I do my computer work.

In our difficult time, God is there to help us.



Ended at 9.45pm

Friday, November 02, 2018

Blank mind


My baby, I'm in my blog page, starring at this blank white page and my mind is totally blank on what I want write.

I have not been in this page for the past 3 week, but I kept thinking of my blog. I told myself, I want to keep writing and writing. At last I couldn't manage to do so..

Even though, I'm writing now, I'm thinking what to write.

I have been going to physio/occupation therapy and my regular check ups' in GH and try not to think of negative things. To be active throughout the day and do my best everyday.

Everyday, life is tough, but I have fight for it. Though many times/days feel like giving, but my inner self says "don't give up". That's why I stay strong.

Writen in end of Oct 18'

Monday, October 08, 2018

Trying to think positive


I'm trying my very best to think positive.
I'm trying my best to take things easy and not hard on myself
I'm trying my best not to think bad /hurtful thing in my past
I'm trying my best not to think of negative things
I try to talk/think positively
I try to sing more

Avoid negative thoughts
Avoid thinking of the past (people who hurt me)
Avoid mixing around with friends' who gossip .

Dear God , please help me able to do the above things!!!

Saturday, September 22, 2018

My life on earth


Dear Good God

I give you all posts in my blog...All the things happening in my life, please do help me....

My thinking, feeling and emotion is going down and down each day..Till today I don't know what to do when I'm in front of my computer. 

I feel so restless everyday. "What am I doing on earth", I'm thinking about it everyday. I know I'm taking care of my family medication, other than that I do not know what my life is about.

You always say "There's a purpose for everyone on earth", I can't see what I'm doing here.. 

Dear God, please help me to know the PLAN you have for me. Also fill your LOVE for me in my heart as I'm feeling very empty inside 

Thank you GOD for listening to me! 


Sunday, September 09, 2018

The Changed


I have changed so much from a happy person with many close friends' into a lonely person who stays at home everyday. A person who enjoyed going out to shopping malls and to many other place into a person who have mood to go anywhere. Though my heart desire to go out to as many places I want, but I don't anyone to bring me out and I don't have mood to enjoy things outside

Even when I go out with family or outstation with friends, the happiness within me is only a short time. Then the empty feelings and sadness will come back within me again. I don know why, but I don't have the happiness within me. I hardly smile these recent years.

Though my photos showed my happy smiling face, but the fact is I was/am not happy at all.

Saturday, August 18, 2018

Good mood, please come back!!!


I have many things I wanted to write. I completely have no mood and my mind is blank on what to write. In my heart, I wanted to say a lot of things. But like I said I have no mood to write.

Other than that, I have no mood, I was occupied with doing other things. Other than that, I went to GH for check-ups. The thing I hated most is - I feel so so tired and sleepy the everday due to my medicine. I wished I don't have to take any medicine. But the fact, I HAVE to.....

I so glad that I keep my blog alive till today.. Because I loved writing

Monday, August 06, 2018

Terrible mood


I feel so terrible and low mood since the last few days. Specially today, I so terribly no good - feel tired, sleepy, low mood and lifeless since this morning till night. More tired and sleepy then my usual days taking spasms medicine.

I don't understand what is wrong with me.  Is it the depression medicine I cut off? The medicine the doctor gave medicine and it didn't suit me. It made my body not well, so I stopped taking it.

Sorry baby, I'm only writing a short note for this post..I'm feeling very tired and no mood today. 

Tuesday, July 31, 2018

Specially For My Darling Sister


On Sunday, we celebrated Julie's birthday. She has been looking forward for her birthday since one month ago.  We went To Gurney Plaza Mall to celebrated her birthday. She loved to go outing, but sadly it's hard to bring her out. She has to be carried into the car. So she accept it to stay at home unless we have family birthday or special occasion. Then we bring her outing.

Since it was Sunday, there were a lot of people went shopping. Ir was difficult to find a parking lot, but thank God a car got out and we had a parking space.

We straight went up to 4th floor to D.I.Y. shop (a shop which sell all cheap things). We checked out we wanted to buy, but it doesn't have. We went for lunch at Chopper Board Restaurant which was only opposite D.I.Y. shop.





                                             Happy Birthday, my dear loving sister



We had western food and all of us enjoyed our meal. There were many foreign workers work there as waiters' and waitress. When our food arrived, we enjoyed our meal.  I saw few families eating in that restaurant too. After lunch, we adjourned to other floors for shopping. All of us had a great time.

It was an enjoyable family outing. All of us enjoyed our lunch and shopping.



                                                         
                                                        

                                              Coffee Cheese Cake for birthday girl
                                                           


I bought a cake for Julie (coffee and cheese cake). When we came home, we say birthday song. cut the cake and enjoyed the cake. 

I thank God for Julie's life till today! It's wonderful to see her talk and laugh everyday and to see there's so much life in her....Though of she had gone though a lot of suffering the past years and throughout her whole life. Our family love and care for her keep her life going. And God is the One who give Julie life.



Friday, July 27, 2018

If wishes come true


Dear God, I have many dreams and wishes in my entire life. Some came true, some did not. I thank you for the dreams/wishes which had come true.

Dear God, I present my all dreams/wishes to you :

1.  I wished I could study to higher school, but I thank you God that I went to Spastic Centre (disabled school) to get some knowledge and therapy.

2.  I wished I could walk, but because of my weak body/limbs and spasms. (will never come true)

3. I wishwd I can work outside and earn more income. I have worked in few NGOs', but what I got was I got insulted and looked down by my colleagues and people due to my medication and weakness. I will never want to look for outside jobs anymore, but accept my condition that I will never able to work outside. But thank God for giving me knowledge on computer/internet. To earn some income at home by learning to do online sales.

4.  I wished to have a boyfriend. Thank you God for giving a guy who love, care and understanding and accept my condition.

5.   I wished to get married and wear my dream wedding gaun, but that will NEVER come true.

6.  I wished to have a child of my own. That will NEVER EVER come true due to my medication. Adopting a child also will NEVER come true.

7.  I wished t have o a small apartment and that will NEVER come true.

8.  I wished I have a close friend who understand my feelings. We can talk to and share our feelings.

9.  I wished there's someone to bring out/company me wherever I want to go.

10. I wished that I get the chance to travel to overseas and see the world. But I thank God that I had visited Japan and Lourdes (Paris) in early 2000's.

11. I wished I can take care of Julie, but I've my limitation. What I can do, I try my best to care for her.

12. I wished that I can help other disabled.

13.  I wished I don't have depression, but be happy always.


Dear God, this is all my wishes/dreams. My life is in Your Hands'. Whether it come true or not, I will accept it.



                                                  

                                                 Sweet Sensation - If wishes came true
                                           
                                         
                      

Sunday, July 22, 2018

Done the best

A week had past by again. As I know, I did my best. I occupied my time with posting up listings for sale and thinking and searching online on how to do do more things. Did Janice company work (in her house) twice last week.

I went to GH twice last week for my regular check-up at Psychiatrist Department and another day Dental Department as my filling came out. Luckily, I called for appointment and the next day I could get my tooth done. Thank God for leading me and Julie to GH Dental as we disabled with special card get free treatment. Thank God also Julie and myself got good, understanding and patient dentist. They understand our condition. 

My spasm also came and go, but it wasn't severe. I took things easy and couldn't do much work. Had to rest me. 

Thank God I did what I could and my best for last week. Another week comes again, how the days will go by, with God's help I will do my best!





Kool & The Gang - Cherish
                                                       

Tuesday, July 17, 2018

My regular check-up

This morning I went to psychiatrist department for my usual check-up in GH. There were a lot of people of all races with different metal sickness waiting to see the doctors'  We put our card inside the box in front of the counter and waited for our name to be called. After our names were called, we take our number and a small chit to the back and everyone have to test the blood pressure and  weight. Because I'm on the wheelchair, they can only check my pressure. All of us went back to our sit and wait for the doctors to called our name before we go into the doctor's room. This is the usual procedure we have to do.  

I waited for more than 1 hour before my name was called. I hope and prayed that I would get my  regular doctor who saw me twice before. Thank God I got the same doctor again. Sometimes, they would change different doctors to see different patients. I was relief that I got the same doctor again. 

This Malay doctor is kind and gentle person. He asked me how I felt and I told him all my emotion and thinking feelings/problem and I told I felt terrible.  He looked through my file and talked to me. I'm not happy as he asked me to take another type of medication. Now I have to take 2 different type of medicine. Anyway, I have to follow what the doctor's say. He gave me two weeks to try the medicine before he sees' me again.

After seeing the doctor, my maid pushed me down (ground floor) to take medication at the famisi. There were a lot of people waiting to take medication too.

I quite scare to take new medicine as sometimes have side effect or what so ever. I really pray that this medicine suit me and don't give me any side effect.





Marc Anthony - My Baby You


Monday, July 16, 2018

Going thru hard time

Depression turns me this type of person :


1.   I'm very unhappy

2.  I always want to be alone in my room

3.  Feel no mood and have terrible feelings

4.  Have no appetite 

5.  Though I accomplished many things, yet I don't feel happy

6.  Don't feel like mixing/talking to anyone

7.  My heart is empty

8.  Keep thinking of the past and feeling hurt inside me

9.  Though I talk to Julie and make her laugh, I laugh too. But I'm not happy myself

10.   I don't have friends'/closed one to to talk too

11. Many times feel like crying, but cannot cry

There are other feelings' too which are not good. Very difficult to express out.






New Kids On The Block -I'll Be Loving You (Forever)
                                          




The real ME



Outwardly, people will see me as someone who is pretty, soft but a boring person. Because I always looked tired, sleepy (due to my medication) I hardly talk to anyone when I meet. Though, I'm an out-going person, my problem is conversing with people. I have a phobia talking to people/friends I meet, afraid I would say the wrong words that will hurt their feeling. What I do is to keep quiet.


Before our argument (my friends and myself), I could easier talk, but now at times when they called me, I have to think twice before I speak. I don't why I'm so afraid to talk. Not to my friends only, but everyone I meet. When relatives or friends' visit us, I don't talk to them, instead I hide in my room and do my work. That's why I don't have friends'

Inwardly, I'm a strong, brave and courageous person. I never give up in whatever I do. Before my sickness, I used go out on the road on my motorised wheelchair alone on the busy road. I only went to nearby my area like to Genaral Hospital for weekly therapy. It was very trilled for me to go on the road by myself. I also went to Gurney Plaza Mall and few other places. It was a freedom for me.

I faced with few accidents while on the way to my destination. I fell dowon the road, I clashed with a motorcycle, my motorised wheelchair battery were flat while on my way back from shopping. These were the few accidents I faced while on the road. Thank God nothing happen to me. This is a great experience for me.

Due to my sickness which lasted for 2 years, I didn't go out by myself at all. Now, I have phobia of going out by myself as afraid that my spasms will attack me anytime. I hardly go out now, only sometimes go out to shopping mall with my family.




Backstreet Boys - It's True
                                 

Saturday, July 14, 2018

Spent time on the beach



It was a great sunny morning, Janice took me to the beach (which I went the 2nd time) in the morning where her in-laws were having picnic/barbecue there. It was a really nice place with big and shady trees'.  When Janice and I arrived, Denis, my brother in-law were doing the barbecue. The rest of their family were all playing cards. 

The beach was really nice as there were no stairs or steps. Cars and motorcycles could straight drive onto the beach. After we arrived, people of all races started came in to the beach. Some were family, others' were couple. A group of young men also came in on their motocycles to enjoy themselves playing balls . I can say people all ages went there to get fresh air and enjoy themselves

I, myself was enjoying the fresh air and played ball with Janice. After finished playing with Janice, we ate barbecue chicken and satay and other food her in-laws cooked.

I especially love to see the ocean and the water flooring. It gives me peace in my heart, sadly I hardly go the beach as no one brings me there.

The ocean is also the creation of GOD!!!







                                                   At the beach

Friday, July 06, 2018

Not a good week


This first week of July, is not a good week for me. I'm unable to do many things due eye sight problem lead my headache and my spasm start attacking me again. It makes my limbs stiff and I unable my daily work and things. I have difficulty in breathing too. I don't feel angry or frustrated now if not it will effect my eyesight or my spasm will get worst. I have take things easy. What I did watch movies on my computer and rest more.

I cannot fight against my sickness, but take it easy. GOD is in charge of my life and I have leave everything HIM - in good and bad times.  I look forward for better weeks ahead.

Sunday, July 01, 2018

Months past like the wind


Today is the 1st of July! 6 months of 2018 has passed without realizing. Could imagine time flew so fast. What did I do for the past 6 months? I believe I had done a lot of things, but I couldn't remember what I had done. Funny ya!!! What I knew everyday was morning became night.

I knew I had accomplished in my sales, the past 6 months. What I had done was my best! Certain months were more and certain months were less. I couldn't complain much as this is buying and selling. It's like our life, certain months we are doing good and some months are not.

It goes the same like depression (moods) Some days were good, some days not. I have accept this fact and continue seeing my doctor. 

What I know GOD had helped me through the past 6 months and will continue to lead and guide me on What will to come, I will not know. Only GOD knows!

Thursday, June 28, 2018

My life in GOD's hand


I thank GOD for my mum who has good health and strength to care for us. She has a strong will and positive in mind. She cares for us since we were born. In good and bad times, she care and love us  patiently with all her loved.

Many times I cannot avoid myself from thinking about the future. It's really scary when think about it. My fear is when my mum will not be with us anymore one day. She took real good care of us the whole of our entire life. If she is gone one day, what will happen to us.

Now she is 80 over. Day in and night she still can take care of us with the help of our maid. Despite her one eye side, she still can drive (short distant) to morning church and cook for us and do her daily things for us.

Despite my fear, I believe GOD has a plan for us and HE will surely not abandoned us (HIS special children). I need to trust in GOD to take care of our future.

Our life in GOD's hands. I need to place my trust in HIM and HE will lead me on!





Friday, June 22, 2018

A great time in KL/Genting


Recently, my darling, myself and friends went to Kuala Lumpur/Genting Highlands for 3 day and 2 nights. We started our journey around 9 something on 10 June. We had a smooth ride as there were not many cars on the highway. We stopped at the rest house once. There was a disabled toilet, but when I went I was shocked to see the toilet had no railings or bars to hold. I tried my best to do my toileting. I said to myself "what a lousy disabled toilet?" We continue our journey and arrived in KL town around 2pm. Because KL highway has many routes. We lost our way few times as we turned into few wrong roads  It's took us more than an hour to reach our hotel.

Everyone of us were relief when we reached our destination. We checked in hotel around 3.30pm. Later we went for lunch opposite Jusco hyperrmarket. It's around 5mins drive away from our hotel. After lunch, we went groceries shopping. We bought a lot of food stuff back to the hotel and walked around to see there were so many shops and stores in the mall. There were a lot of people specially Muslim doing last minute shopping for their Malay New Year. 

We headed back to the hotel to bath and rest. The whole evening we stayed in the hotel, ate what we bought in the room.Everyone was chit-chatting and had a great time together. For me, as a quiet person, I listen to them talking and had fun. 


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Day 2

Genting Highlands, here we come!!! My favourite place!! I have not been there for nearly 2 years. I missed this place so much!  It was very nice and cooling place to stay in. There are many entertain outlets for young and old. 


We all got ready and headed for Genting around 11 something. It was a smooth ride all the way up.
We reached and checked into a free complimentary room which few of my friends and myself are members' of Genting World Resort. As one of my friend's is a disabled, the counter staff gave us a disabled room.

Wow!!! the disabled room was very big and spaces with sofa, couch and a big disabled toilet equip with bars and railings. The bathing side has a sitting place for disabled. After settled down in the room, all of us went out to checked out the place. Some of us went different place. Few friends and myself went to see the places and almost got lost. As Genting renovated the place for last few years into a bigger and beautiful place.  The place changed a lot, we went round and round to see the new place.  

My friends wanted to checked our members card, but was really hard to find the counter. They had changed places, but at last we found it. There were many people queing up at the counter either to apply new membership cards of change new card. My friend's and myself change our membership  card.

We were there only few hours as a friend of ours' had to dropped few of us back KL hotel. We started our journey around 4.30pm and reached KL town half hour later. It was really unbelievable as we were stuck in a terrible traffic jam in KL town for around 4 hours. We reached the hotel about 9.30pm. We were all relief upon reaching as we were very hungry and our bodies ached.

Upon reaching the hotel lift, we were shocked the lift was spoiled. We couldn't do anything, so we went over to the Indian coffee shop next door to the hotel and had our dinner. Then, we went to Jusco to buy few things. Luckily, my friend took us there. I urgently needed to find a toilet, luckily there was a disabled toilet. Thank God for that!!! I was so glad to relief myself.

After bought our things, we went back to the hotel. We faced a big problem when we went back to the hotel. No one came to repaired the lift!!! My goodness, they had to carry up to the 2nd floor!!! Two of the hotel workers and my darling carried me. I was so terrible scared while they carried me. My heart nearly fell off and I couldn't breath as the fright was there. At last thank God we reached 2nd floor. 

My friends who was supposed to go back to Genting was unable to back there as it was too late to drive back. They slept in the hotel.

Everyone was very tired, got ready and went to bed very fast


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Day 3

We woke up early and got ready checked out from the hotel. We checked out from KL hotel and headed up to Genting around 9.30am. Some of them brought breakfast up to Genting to eat in the hotel room. Without much traffic, we took one and half hour to reach Genting. It was quite fast.

We straight went to our room, some had breakfast and showered themselves. Most of us enjoyed each other company talking and laughing.

After all got ready, we checked out from the room. We went round the see the places. Some of them went to played some game. I enjoyed myself very much as when we went around and see the nice places with loud music and a lot of people. There were many entertainment places for children, youngsters and adults.

The time has come for us to go back. We took off around 4.30pm, drove slowly on the highway. Thank God there were not much traffic jam all the way. Some of us fell asleep in the car. We stopped in Ipoh town (Perak) for dinner in a coffee shop. In that area, there were many eating places with a lot of people. There were several shops, stalls selling a lot of things.

It was night then, we slowly drove as there were many cars on the highway. We reached Penang 11pm over and dropped few of my friends before dropped me. I reached home home nearly 12am.

All of us had a enjoyable time. I had a great time with my friends. Though there were few difficult times, we all took it cool and calm. 


Friday, June 15, 2018

Depression difficult to cope


In early 2017, I started going back to GH Physiatrist after I stopped my treatmemt for few years. My depression got worst and my spasm attacked me severely in 2016 and 2017. Neurologies doctors' told me it was connected to my emotion. That was why after I increased my spasm medicine, yet my spasm attacked me severely.  

It felt really terrible after I stopped my depression medicine.. I never knew my emotion feelings so horrible. I felt like going mad.

After what the Neurologies doctors' told me, I went back to Physiatrist department. The doctors' asked me why I stopped coming, I told them the medication didn't suit me. From that time onwards, they changed my medicine.

At the beginning of last year, the doctors' gave me one tablet. My mood was slightly better, but I kept thinking the past that people hurt me. Also many other incidents. This make me very unhappy.

This medicine also calm my mood. When I stopped the medicine last few years, I easily get angry, irritated, frustrated and many other different feelings.

Starting this year, they asked me how I feel, I kept sharing with them my negative thoughts and feelings. Because of that, doctor increased my medicine to 2 tablets. My appointment with to see doctor is mostly every two months. Early this month when I see the doctor, I shared with them my negative thoughts and feelings quite the same  feelings as before. Again the doctor increased my medicine to 3 tables.

 I felt very sad as I wasn't getting better but still the same yet have to increased my medicine. I still feel very sad and empty inside my heart

Friday, June 08, 2018

Great friends became enemies


There is one person I often think off. I knew her since childhood when I was 11 years old. At that time when I was at Spastic Centre (my disabled school). During rest time, she walked and stand by my side (she was 6 years old then). That was when our friendship started.

As smart kids, we were always in the same classroom. Everyday during rest time, she would come and talked to me. As our houses was nearby then, some weekends, her mum would dropped her at my house. We talked and played for few hours before her mum took her home. It was the same for me. My dad would dropped at her house too.

As we grew up, we became best friends' until adults. At the aged of 20, I left Spastic Centre, but she continued her studies to normal college. I was very happy for her. Every night after dinner, she would called me and we talked about an hour.

She would share with me many stories and tell me problems. On my side, I gave her a listening eat we talked and laughed.

I was happy she managed to finished her college life despite all the hurdled she faced. She was able to graduated and I was very proud of her.

When we were adults, we continue to chit-chat every night on  the phone. During festive time, she invited me few other close friends from Spastic Centre to her house for lunch or dinner.

Every weekends, 5-6 of  us closed friends spent time at the shopping mall together having lunch and shopping etc. It was really a great time for us all. After few of us had partners, we still meet at during weekends

As time passed, we had a group chat online. We talked about everything and anything, we had a great time together every night.

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We were such great friends until 2010 when my best friend and myself had a big fight over a personal matter. It was partly my fault. We quarreled a lot then. When we saw each other, we dislike each other. From then on, our friendship broke off.

Sometimes when we met at shopping mall, we don't talked at all. I talked very few word with other of my close friends. We were very cold to each other. As years passed by, each of went our own way. We hardly called each other too.

If I meet them in the shopping mall, I had some fear of talked to them. I would greet them with "hello" and smile to them. Few times, they invited me for lunch and I went. They talked happily, but I I kept quiet. I was afraid to talked to them in case I hurt their feelings again.

It had been 8 years since our friendship broke off. In the beginning we was really mad at them. When years passed, we cooled down, talked a bit when meet. My best friend and myself sadly were not like the friends before.

In our heart, we still miss and think of each other. I can feel that that in my heart, but our friendship couldn't like before again. Now, we still text each other sometimes.

I feel very sad when think of the great friends we were, specially my best friend and myself. The whole friendship was gone because of an argument.

At present, I'm not mad with her anymore. I still miss and think of her.







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